A Beginner's Guide to Prayer
by Trillia Newbell
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Some things just seem easier to learn as a kid. Whether it’s how to swim, or ski, or speak a new language - kids seem to absorb new skills so much faster and more naturally. I learned how to hula hoop, dance, and ride a bike as a kid, but one thing I didn’t learn was how to pray.
I became a Christian at 22 years old. The lady who first shared the gospel with me told me she had several friends praying I would come to know the Lord, and the day I made that commitment, three friends gathered around me and joined me in praying to the Lord for the forgiveness of my sin. But I still needed to learn how to pray as an adult. Prayer wasn’t something that came naturally for me.
Maybe you are a new Christian or you haven’t ever committed yourself to prayer. Or maybe prayer has simply been odd to you—you can’t see God and you wonder is he really there and does he actually hear you? The greatest benefit of prayer, of course, is that we have the privilege to participate in communion with God. But I remember feeling the newness of it and my questions about it. Even Jesus didn’t assume we’d understand how to pray and graciously taught his followers in the Sermon on the Mount (Matthew 6: 5-15). Everything in the Christian life is a process, including learning disciplines like prayer. You and I can grow in our prayer lives.
As you begin your journey into praying, it could be tempting to give you a big to-do list. Instead, I’d like to suggest two things that have helped me and continue to assist me in my pursuit of God through prayer.
Remember the who
It’s astonishing to me that we can say the words, “Our Father,” as we see in Matthew 6:9, as Jesus is teaching his disciples how to pray. God is holy and awesome in every way and yet He is also our Father, who not only allows us to speak to him, but also invites us to. God invites us to draw near to his throne of grace (Hebrews 4:16). We are praying to the one who is described as a rock (1 Samuel 2:2); all-knowing (Isaiah 40:13-14); and all-powerful (Luke 1:37). God is greater than our hearts and minds can begin to imagine—and yet mindful of us (Psalm 8:4). God loves us with an everlasting love—so much so that he gave his son for us (John 3:16). This is only a taste of who our God, our Father, is. Remember who he is and let it motivate you to run to him in prayer.
Go and do
As I’ve been teaching my kids to pray, one of the most common phrases they say is, “Mommy, I don’t know how.” In helping them understand how to pray, I could teach them the Lord’s Prayer (and I will), but I’ve decided to start even more basic: I ask them simply to speak. I tell them they can talk to God.
I don’t think this advice is reserved for children. I think you and I can benefit from simply opening our mouths and speaking to God. We don’t need to over complicate it. We need to speak, ask, beg, cry, thank, and plead—He is listening! Our prayers need not be complicated or have lofty words. As a matter of fact, Jesus specifically told us God isn’t impressed with that (Matthew 6:7). We can be real, honest, and humble before him.
Practically: you can grab a friend and ask her to begin to pray with you as a way to learn to pray. I remember meeting with my two girlfriends every other week for several years after I first became a Christian, sharing about the various trials we were experiencing, the joys of life, and praying each time.
Something else to try could be memorizing the Lord’s prayer and reciting it back to the Lord, or opening the Psalms and praying through those as a guide, or writing out your prayers in a journal. It’s been 18 years since I started my first wobbly attempts at learning to pray, and I’m still continuing to learn and grow in my prayer life. It is one of the sweetest ways of communing with my Father. God invites me to come to him, day or night—anytime I need to, and in honesty, I sometimes still stumble in my words. I’m thankful that in my weakness, when I don’t know what exactly to say, the Lord knows and the Spirit intercedes for me (Romans 8:26).
Most of all, it encourages me to remember that God longs to hear our prayers: “Before they call I will answer; while they are yet speaking I will hear” (Isaiah 65:24). Pray—He is listening.
Trillia Newbell
Trillia Newbell is the author of a new six-week Bible study on Romans 8, If God is For Us: The Everlasting Truth of Our Great Salvation. You can find her at trillianewbell.com and follow her on twitter and facebook.
