Conditioning For Community

Just a few weeks ago, as I was scrolling through my emails, my eyes caught the subject line of an email that read “Reminder: You are registered for an upcoming event”.  After opening it, I realized my ever so generous older sister had registered both of us for a marathon.  My family has a unique way of saying “I miss you”.

Marathons mean one thing: conditioning.  Today, this necessary discipline had me up at 4:00 and out the door by 5:30.  Early mornings are the best time to create space in my day for a 10 mile run.  On a dark and quiet drive toward the beach, my mind began to race (no pun intended) around the idea of training. I knew that this race wasn’t the only thing I had ever trained for.  I began to question the things that have required my consistent discipline.  This marathon isn’t the first thing that I have trained for and it won’t be the last.  As I continued to process (or conveniently delay my inevitable run) I was reminded of how easily we neglect our most basic needs.  So often, we don’t condition the most important areas of our lives at all.  

In my past article I wrote about our two basic human needs:

1. To belong;

2. To be loved;

Today, I am excited to share with you a few practical steps that I have found to be helpful as I walk through my own weakness.  These are simple thoughts to carry on our human quest for belonging — starting from the inside out:

1. Heart Condition

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I have a special love for a long run simply because it is in this challenge that you are physically forced to be your total self.  All that will push you forward on hard pavement is: the pair shoes you put on your feet and the strength you built out over time. Mile 13 of a training run can’t run off of “good luck”. It is raw, authentic, painful, and rewarding. This is what happens when we remain consistent in our innermost self — our heart. One of my favorite scriptures is Hebrews 13:8. The Message translation reads: “There should be a consistency that runs through us all. For Jesus doesn't change — yesterday, today, tomorrow, he's always totally himself”. I am personally so inspired by those two words “totally himself”. That is the ultimate goal of heart conditioning — to be totally ourselves.

This Week: One of the easiest ways I have found to start conditioning your heart towards belonging is to create space each morning.  Make time to strengthen your spirit before you start your day.  I started very simply with 10 minutes of reading, 10 minutes of worship, 10 minutes of prayer.  The key to conditioning is consistency.

Consistency is the enemy of anxiety.

2: Head Condition

Anyone who has spent time in Los Angeles could write a list of factors that make community feel hard.  Stepping in, you are encouraged to chase after your individual dream while watching out for others.  This alone can quickly feel isolating.  You can add comparison, inconsistency, striving, and personal-focus to the mix.  These are all things that you can find without looking too hard, but I was determined to step beyond this.  When I moved to this city, I made a commitment to myself that has deepened my perspective.  I am able to find joy and energy in the people of this city because I made a commitment to keep my perspective straight.

“How are people thinking about me?” → “How am I thinking about other people?”

Peace always follows perspective. Step back, condition your thoughts, change your posture, proceed. 



This Week: Choose three people in your life who you have attached negative thoughts to in regards to community. This could be someone as close as family member that has been hurtful or as distant as a political leader that you find to be discouraging for future community. Your challenge this week is to answer the question “How am I thinking about ____” .  Continue to challenge your thoughts in regards to these three people. This will provide vivid and written clarity on the condition of your thoughts which shape your posture towards community. Moving forward you will have a strengthened perspective and posture.



3: Hand Condition

When I am conditioning for a marathon, my mornings look something like this: wake up, question if I really need to run or not, have coffee, jump in the car, question again if I really really need to run… and all of this is before I ever put one foot in front of the other. This is an accurate depiction of how our hands can respond to serving our community.  Serving often looks like showing up.  Show up for people. In traffic? Show up.  Not feeling your best? Show up. Show up. Busy? Show up. Not comfortable? Show up. To quote Louie Giglio from his latest book Goliath Must Fall—“Faith thrives in holy discomfort”. (strongly recommend this read)

Showing up to for another is the clearest way to ensure that you are living out of abundance.  Abundance does not mean you look at your bank account to make sure you are still resting on a few million dollars.  In fact, that lifestyle can create even more lack than abundance.  To live a lifestyle of abundance is to live with generous hands. Generosity is contagious. I have personally committed to growing in this area of my life.  While I am growing, I am continually to watching those around me with generous hands. Their lives are filled with belonging, love, joy, and, you guessed it, a lot of showing up. As we journey along to serve our most basic human need – to belong – I challenge you to show up for those around you. Allow your hand condition to be one of generosity. My prayer is that the posture of our hearts, heads, and hands would grow healthy communities deeply rooted in belonging.

“Treat people as if they were what they ought to be, and you help them become what they are capable of becoming” – Goethe

This Week:

There is someone in each of your lives who is waiting for you to show up this week.  You are uniquely positioned to serve. The challenge for you is to say yes where you would usually say no.  Make time to have a friend over for dinner or offer to help a co-worker with a project.  It doesn't have to be extravagant; just show up.  Use the conditioning of your heart and head to gain the generosity your hands require. You are capable of building a generous life.  You are capable of belonging.  You are capable of treating people as if they are what they ought to be.

“…if being in a community of the Spirit means anything to you, if you have a heart, if you care— then do me a favor: Agree with each other, love each other, be deep-spirited friends. Don’t push your way to the front; don’t sweet-talk your way to the top. Put yourself aside, and help others get ahead. Don’t be obsessed with getting your own advantage. Forget yourselves long enough to lend a helping hand”


Philippians 2.3-4 (MSG)

Caroline Beckman

With a passion to communicate the connection between the current reality and future potential of those around her, Caroline Beckman has been an entrepreneur within the wellness industry since her teenage years. Caroline is the youngest of three born and raised in Sacramento. She currently spends her time between Los Angeles and your local airport terminal, is a part of Zoe Church, and will join you for any adventure by the ocean.