For Those Who Feel Unworthy of Love

by Diane Sambdman

Sophia is the Greek word for Wisdom, and Propel Sophia seeks out the voices of truly wise women and asks them to share worked examples of how they express faith in daily life. Pull up a chair at Sophia’s table, won’t you? There’s plenty of space.

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There are days when it’s hard to understand that God truly does love me. On those days, all I can see is the mess that I am and the sins that I keep committing. It’s not that I want to be a repetitive sinner, but left to my own devices, I tend to wander off the path and away from his loving care and protection and I end up in some sort of trouble or frustrating situation.

Repeat After Me: God is not Like my Human Dad

On the days when I can't seem to stay on my feet and put one foot in front of the other, I have to remind myself that God still loves me even then. His love for us is never based on our own “performance,” it is based solely on his goodness and his grace and mercy.

If you’ve ever struggled with feelings of unworthiness, you might relate to this struggle. It’s difficult for me to not think I have to do this, that, or the other to make him happy with me. One way I get stuck is by unintentionally assigning traits to God that don’t reflect him at all, but rather are based on my own limited experiences.

I was raised in a home with a perfectionist dad and I always felt like I had to do just the right things, in the right way, or I would disappoint him. I never wanted to disappoint my parents so I stayed stuck in a vicious cycle of performance for decades instead of living freely under the grace God so freely pours out upon us.

Choosing to Believe I Matter to God

When I find myself relating to God like I related to my earthly parents, I cut myself off from his power and ability to work in my life. My resistance hinders his best for me on those days. God will never force us to do anything, so I have to choose to repent of my old ways of thinking about him and choose to believe what his Word says over how I feel. It’s a day-by-day decision—sometimes even moment-by-moment—depending on the circumstances. No matter what decision I make, He is always right there waiting for me.

One day I was feeling extremely overwhelmed and hopeless, and I prayed: “Thank you for your forgiveness and for loving little ole inconsequential me.” Immediately God spoke to my heart and He told me that I am never inconsequential to him. He reminded me that He personally and lovingly created me. He said He was intentional in how He created me and He loves me no matter what. He reminded me that He sent his son to die a very public and excruciating death on the cross in my place because of his great and unfailing love for me.

I sat there in silence, in complete awe and wonder that the Creator of the universe and everything in it loves each and every one of us so deeply. It amazes me that none of us are ever too far gone for him to save us.

Romans 8:38-39 tells us “For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.”

There is nobody and nothing that can keep him from reaching us, saving us, and keeping us with him for all of eternity if we choose to accept him as our Lord and Savior. Nothing can obstruct his love.

On days when it’s hard to believe that God truly does love inconsequential little ole you, this is the truth we all can come back to.

DIANE SAMBDMAN

Diane Sambdman is the daughter of a Marine, mother of 5, and still being molded by God. She has been through the trials of emotional, mental, physical and spiritual abuse, family addictions and loss. She blogs about how the grace of God will help you through the pain and distractions this world throws at you.