Ministering when they won’t call me a Minister
by Sunhee Robinson
Sophia is the Greek word for Wisdom, and Propel Sophia seeks out the voices of truly wise women and asks them to share worked examples of how they express faith in daily life. Pull up a chair at Sophia’s table, won’t you? There’s plenty of space. Learn more here.
The hours we’d traveled seemed to melt away as our team of eight pulled up at the small Paraguayan church. We had come to visit a missionary our church had sent two years prior. She was so happy to see us, and their whole congregation was excited to see what God would do during our time together.
In anticipation of our coming, the church had planned a series of revival services that we were to lead. Within a few hours of our arrival we gathered at the church to prepare for the first meeting that night.
Can a woman be a pastor?
Our missionary took me by the hand as I entered the sanctuary and led me straight to a towering and stately looking gentleman. “Pastor,” she said with excitement in her voice, “I’d like to introduce you to my pastor from America!” And as he turned to meet the American man he was expecting, a look of sheer disappointment and disgust filled his face as he found himself looking down upon a little, five foot two inch asian woman.
He turned and walked away without even shaking my hand. This confused our missionary, so she followed him—still pulling me along by the hand—and beckoned for his attention again. “Pastor, I’d like you to meet my pastor from America!” Not wanting to refuse her a second time, he reluctantly shook my hand before walking away without uttering a word.
I felt dumb. I felt rejected. And I felt humiliated. And I hate to say it, but that feeling was all too familiar to me. This was not the first time this little asian woman has been looked down upon by big ministry men for no other reason than that I am a little asian woman. In my heart I cried out: , “Lord, what am I going to do? How am I supposed to minister here under such overt and unapologetic rejection?” But the still, small voice of the Lord immediately whispered, “My daughter, do not be afraid; keep your head held high and walk in confidence! He will soon see what I will do through you!”
Revival in the House
That night, the pastor and all of his leaders sat at the back of the church, passive-aggressively communicating their disapproval by remaining disengaged throughout the service. But I clung to the Lord’s word and did not allow this to deter me. I preached my heart out and experienced an unusual anointing of the Holy Spirit! Dozens flooded the aisles as people responded: tears and joy overflowing.
During the altar call, there was one particular woman that the Spirit of God highlighted to me, so I called her out and began to prophesy over her before the congregation. As I ministered to her, something broke, not only in her, but in the church, and she was powerfully overwhelmed by the Spirit of God. I found out later that this woman was the pastor’s wife and that this was the first time she had stepped foot in the church all year. She had stopped coming to church six months before because she had been deeply hurt by the leadership I spent much of the following day with her, helping her seek reconciliation with her husband and the leaders in the church: we witnessed a powerful work of forgiveness and reconciliation!
Feeling inadequate, and yet called
From that day on, that big man could not bring himself even to look at me the previous day now followed me around, eager to see what I was going to do next. Whenever there were difficult situations, he would be heard saying, “Where’s Pastor Sunhee?” When they prayed for a sick person who was not being healed… “Where is Pastor Sunhee?” He went from believing that this little asian girl couldn’t do anything to believing that I could do everything!
Of course, I know better than to believe that I can do everything. In fact, I often felt inadequate and ill-equipped for the crazy situations we were facing. But I approached each situation with a simple trust that God would somehow show us what to do, and He did again and again. He is always faithful to provide where he has called (1 Thessalonians 5:24, 2 Corinthians 9:8)
I’m thankful to be married to a man who saw ministry gifts in me before I saw them in myself, and to serve alongside him in a church that honors me not only as the pastor’s wife, but as a pastor myself. However, I’ve been in many situations over the years in which I have been dismissed, disrespected, and/or underestimated because of my small, female, asian frame. I’ve found it important in these moments not to respond by demanding respect for myself, or becoming bitter in my heart. Instead, I continually stop to hear the voice of my Father calling me to lift up my head to the one whose throne is in heaven until my heart begins to hear the word of his affirmation over my life. Once I hear the affirmation of the Lord, it doesn’t matter what people think of me; the only thing that matters is that I hear the voice of my heavenly father in every situation and not be moved by any other voice that tries to disqualify me or shut me down. Obeying and serving Him is, ultimately, all that matters.
Sunhee Robinson
Sunhee Robinson is co-founder of Living Hope Christian Center in Emeryville and San Francisco, California. She has pioneered missionary work in some of the most remote and dangerous places in the world, in which God has used her mightily. She earned her M.A. at Fuller Theological Seminary's School of Inter-Cultural Studies and lives in SF bay area with her husband, Benjamin and their daughter, Alethia.
