Trusting God With Your What-Ifs and New Starts
by Megan Clunan
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There was a season in my life when my sin almost destroyed my marriage. My husband and I were at a place of no return unless God Himself intervened and rescued us. I knew the only assurance of God's rescue required me admitting my sin and stepping into the forgiveness I desperately needed and Jesus so lovingly offered.
So, I chose to bring to light my sin (Ps. 32:5) and found forgiveness (1 John 1:9). Spiritual and relational chains I'd worn for years felt like they fell off and prison doors opened when I found freedom from the thing I hated for so long: how excellent!
However, in looking back on that journey of rescue, while I remember feeling relief at having been able to share with God and my husband what was needed so we could begin the restoration journey (Isaiah 43:25), I also remember being scared. I told God I was afraid. I told God I was overwhelmed with what may come from choosing to live free of sin and fear of what my husband may say or do with my confession. I was so grateful to be free, but the unknown was frightening.
What if I didn't know how to navigate it?
What if I got lost, screwed it up, and found captivity again?
What if our marriage couldn't move beyond the brokenness?
There were so many what-ifs.
Sometimes, the what-ifs can sabotage us from moving into freedom. This is exactly what the enemy of our souls wants. Satan wants to scare us with all the what-ifs and prevent us from walking in the freedom that God has given us in Christ Jesus. Do not let the enemy have a say in how you live your life. Here are two things to do when your what-ifs start talking.
Bring your what-ifs to God
When my marriage was at the point of complete destruction, I brought all my what-ifs to God. And in His gracious lovingkindness, He said, "I love you, so just wait and see what I will do.”
Invite God into the what-ifs and listen to what He says. List all your what-if worries and pray over them. Share with God what you are afraid of. Share with Him what you are worried about and ask Him for His help. Ask God to speak into the what-ifs. Yield to Him and ask Him to strengthen and guard you as you face the what-ifs. Pray Psalm 121 as your Scriptural power against the what-ifs; make the Psalm personal. Put your name in the Psalm and use "I" language to pray it back, praising God for His care and coverage over you.
Remember, we serve the God of “never-before!”
What-if language is fear language. When traveling in faith into new freedom, fear is often ready to sabotage our journey by whispering things like, "You've never succeeded here before; what makes you think you will this time?" or "You've never dealt with something like this before; what makes you think you can do so now?" But while the enemy wields the phrase “never before” as a scary threat, with God never before is a beautiful place. We serve the God of never before!
• Never before had a Jewish woman had the power to affect an entire kingdom and rescue a whole people group – until Esther.
• Never before had a stuttering, culturally-confused murderer had a hope of persuading the most powerful ruler of the known world to let his mass of enslaved people go free – until Moses (Ex. 4-12).
• Never before had a prostitute had the chance to change the course of history and become revered rather than revolting – until Rahab (Joshua 2).
• Never before had God entered human form to show humanity how much He loves and longs to be with us, to make a way to Him without hindrance or necessary performance – until Jesus
• Never before had an impulsive fisherman walked on water or seen the Holy Spirit poured out – until Peter (Mt. 14:22-33; Acts 2:14-41).
• Never before had a Pharisee of Pharisees walked away from his well-earned legalistic faith to follow a Savior he once persecuted to the point of murdering His followers – until Paul (Phil. 3:2-9).
• Never before had the image of a cross elicited hope and peace rather than despair or shame – until Jesus (Col. 2:14-15).
The journey ahead is filled with never-befores; this is true. But God has you (Is. 49:16). Your “never-befores” may be real, but our God specializes in them. 1 Peter 5:6-7 tells us, "Humble yourselves under the mighty hand of God that He may exalt you at the proper time, casting all your anxiety on Him because He cares for you." His might will see you through to complete freedom in His time. Cast all (not some or most, but all!) your anxiety on Him because He cares so very much for you and your future. He will see you through whatever lays ahead and will walk with you in freedom every step of the way!
DR. MEGAN CLUNAN
Dr. Megan Clunan is the Program Head of Moody Bible Institute's Human Services, Crisis and Trauma Care, and Christian Psychology programs in Chicago, IL. Dr. Clunan is also a licensed counselor specializing in adolescent issues, childhood trauma, overcoming shame-based identities, and topics related to marriage and family. She is also the creator and host of the weekly podcast No More Shame, a podcast dedicated to using the tools of psychology and truths of Christian theology to break the shame narrative and heal the wounds that hold us back. Dr. Clunan and her husband of 17 years serve in Student Ministry in their local church and are the parents of two children (ages 12 and 7).
